Sunday, October 21, 2012

Creaming Irish .... Malarkey



The world is so much smaller these days and I think people’s intelligence shrunk right along with it. The ignorance of the masses is more pronounced and colored for all and sundry to feast on. Uncensored and unadulterated access to spewing any pile of fecal matter in 142 letters, or a status update that is an infinite jambalaya of text-speak, spelling accuracy of a dyslexic autistic toddler and the coherence of a drunk homeless immigrant from Chad.

The reason for this rant; great friend of mine Lorraine, who won’t have casual sex with anyone at the moment because she wants it to mean something, brought up the event of Sarkodie being clowned on the twittersphere for his assertion that Irish Cream, the liqueur, to be precise, is an ingredient. Here is the quote: “I’m the missing ingredient in a perfect meal, Call me the Irish Cream

Read more: http://omgghana.com/sarkodies-irish-cream-line-on-the-bet-cypher-goes-viral/#ixzz291VXiA6k

His subsequent explanation: “Okk so just to clear things up 4 ma fans I am missing in da meal so I’m on da side now *irish cream*... N dat is after meal is done!!!

I don’t know whether to cry about the catastrophe that is his above sentence construction to explain his metaphorical  misnomer as judged by the vast Ghanaian twitter brain-bank or be mad at the folly of the group-think manner in which the masses applied their jokes-on-him moment.

I called my younger brother, sent him a voicenote actually, praying that he wasn't on this bandwagon train wreck of ignorance and that is when my heart shattered in more directions than traffic at  Kwame Nkrumah Circle.  I realized one thing through all of this, our culture is mostly skewed for a one-dimensional  isolationist way of viewing things. Simply because Irish Cream is not a prominent part of your general Ghanaian diet does not exclude it from being an ingredient. The larger point being, an ingredient by definition is simply the constitution of any given matter, be it physical or metaphorical. Forget the fact that the most important ingredient in the world’s most expensive coffee is manufactured through the poop of a Kopi Luwak(its an animal- look it up), the gravitas of this issue is quite disturbing. In its own glimpsing way, it could be one explanation for why a lot of our society seems to have such tunnel vision. I wouldn't go off on a tangent and lose your audience.

I am pleading with you to take a little bit more time to understand language a little better. Reading is far more enjoyable when you can make sense of expressions that are an anomaly to your programmed way of thinking. ‘Ingredients’ does not mean just tomatoes, pepper, yam, kontomire, mankani etc. Even the coal-pot can be described as an ingredient, it just needs context. In this context, Sarkodie’s use of Irish Cream in his metaphor is above reproach, grammatically ie. Better still, in any context it was accurate, I may not consider it the smartest metaphor but that is a matter of opinion.

This reeks of the same idea that every chocolate drink is Milo just as every toothpaste is Pepsodent type of thinking. For you TEAMCoolkids as named by my dear Lorraine, the world is much larger and far more challenging than the effort you exert in coming up with your best 142 characters to garner some two-second-fame on the twittersphere. Think your own thoughts, be sure of  your facts before you speak and most importantly,  be independent. So what I’m 30 and have only 3 friends, I’m still smarter than your father’s rich friend. LOL, seriously, it pays to be your own person rather than being a sheep that goes as the wind blows.




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